Have you ever heard the song “House of Fun” by Madness? Not only does this song have an incredibly catchy tune, but it is actually about a boy on his birthday looking to purchase condoms from the local pharmacy, albeit, due to sheer embarrassment, not referencing the condoms directly. Instead terms like “box of balloons with a feather light touch” and “pack of party poppers” are used.
Why am I mentioning this song? Well, because all of us, at least in the beginning feel some degree of awkwardness when we attempt to buy condoms. Hopefully you will eventually outgrow it, although many people do not. On this page, however, I am going to share with you a few tips for feeling a whole lot less awkward when it comes to purchasing condoms.
Condom Buying Tips
Firstly, try not to worry about purchasing condoms. Many people do; I have seen so many people out there purchasing condoms and they can’t, for some reason, seem to make eye contact with the person serving them.
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However, you have to remember that almost everybody out there will have needed to purchase condoms at some point or another. The person behind that counter is most likely selling dozens of boxes each and every day.
They are not going to be judging you. To be honest, they probably do not even care if you are getting “laid” that night. They just want to make a sale. They may not even notice what you are purchasing.
In recent years, many stores have actually started to put condoms out on display making it easier for some people. I know in the past that if I went into a few pharmacies or stores in my local area, supermarkets in particular, the condoms tended to be behind the counter and that was awkward when it came to asking for them. Thankfully, nowadays you can just toss them in with the rest of your shopping and be done with it.
If you are heading to the supermarket to do a bit of shopping, you can try and pick up the condoms there. Most of the awkwardness from condom purchasing comes from the fact that you are just purchasing condoms.
People feel like they are drawing attention to themselves. Go to a supermarket though, and put it in with the rest of your shopping. The person scanning your shopping will not pay the slightest amount of attention to anything that they are putting through the scanner.
Running a register is a mind numbing job. They will have been doing it for hours therefore; you have absolutely no issues to worry about when purchasing condoms from them. They won’t even realize! For all they care, it is just a packet of bacon being scanned through the machine.
Get Free Condoms
If you really do not wish to head to a shop to purchase condoms, then you can always go to your local sexual health clinic. Although, please do make sure that you only go there as a last resort.
The condoms that are given away for free here are probably best reserved for those who can’t possibly afford condoms any other way, so only get them via this method if you really need them.
I am sure you can get over the awkwardness in the shop. In fact, I promise you that you can. The more you purchase condoms from the store, and I hope you have to purchase many of them, the more use to it you are going to get and the less awkward it will become.
As a last resort, many people find that purchasing condoms from a man makes them feel a bit more at ease. I know that, for a fact, when I first started to purchase condoms from the store, I tended to make a beeline for the man behind the counter, particularly if the woman who was serving was incredibly attractive, because it just made things a whole lot easier for me.
This is something that you may want to try, although, bear in mind that the person who is serving will know exactly what you are trying to do.
Get a Help From Your Friend
Some guys ask their friends to help them, this funny clip below will show you how that can turn out :)
Purchase Online
If you do not want any human interaction at all, then you can purchase condoms online. There are a number of different websites out there that you can use for this purpose. There are a number of different benefits to purchasing condoms online as well. Here are a few of the main ones:
There is absolutely no awkwardness. You will be purchasing through a computer thus, nobody will make eye contact with you when you are purchasing condoms. It is just like making any other online purchase.
In addition to this, the vast majority of online condom shops out there will send out unmarked packaging, just to put your mind at ease a little bit.
Although, to be fair, the vast majority of retailers are not going to put “CAUTION: CONDOMS INSIDE” on the outside of the packaging. This would just cue a rather awkward moment with your delivery driver!
When you purchase condoms online, you will tend to have a far bigger selection of them to choose from. It is fair to say that many of the stores out there on the high street, dedicated sex shops included, just sell the most popular condoms. They do not keep a huge variety of different styles and sizes. If you purchase online though, you do have that luxury. This means that you are going to end up with a condom that is absolutely perfect for you. This is one of my favorite things about purchasing online!
Finally, condoms are going to be a whole lot cheaper when you purchase online. This is a bit of a side-benefit for those who are shopping online to deal with the awkwardness, but it is going to be a benefit that you absolutely love.
It will not be just a small saving either; you could quite easily save 30% to 70% off of online prices for condoms. However, do make sure that you try and purchase only from reputable vendors online. This way you know that you are getting the real deal when it comes to purchasing condoms. Here are some options:
1. Undercover Condoms
2. Lucky Bloke
3. Amazon
So, in summary, if you wish to get over the awkwardness of purchasing condoms in shops, just do it. There is no other way around it. However, if you really can’t get over it, and there are very few people out there who can’t, then you can always purchase the condoms online. It will also save you a little bit of money in the long run as an added bonus.
It makes sense that an online shop would have more options for condoms and other sex-related options. I always feel sheepish buying these types of items, but online purchasing will definitely make it easier! I’ll have to find a good website to buy from. Thanks for the info!